Being a single mom and dating ..Sounds like a blast, right?
Let me give you the below scenario…
Most people will be done with their dinner and approaching second base on a couch that isn’t covered with toys, while a single mom will still be trying to get clothes on a wiggly mini human, wearing a half head of curlers with only one leg shaved.
Here are 8 Struggles Single Moms Face When Trying to Date:
1. Babysitter Worth It?
Let’s face it. When you are a single mom, free nights don’t come easy and they for sure do not come cheap. Between the 50 bucks for the babysitter and splitting half the bill, you might have to dip into your kid’s college fund just to pay for your Uber ride home. Unless you are 100 percent sure this guy is worth it, save that 50 bucks from going into some horny teenagers pocket and put it towards that pedicure you will never have time to get.
2. No Spare Time
Did I just say getting a pedicure? Drinks with the girls? Aint that a joke! Trying to find time to even shower is a struggle for most moms when moments to yourself hardly exist. So squeeze in an hour for dinner with a stranger is not exactly high on the “to do” list or on the “realistically ever gonna happen” list, for that matter.
3. Do They Even Like Kids?
A topic that can no longer wait till you are 5 margaritas in on the 4th date is the kid situation. Do they want kids? Are they okay with you having kids? I suppose you can skip this conversation if you are okay with sending your kids off to Malaysian boarding school.
4. But my Routine!
Moms have a routine. It is what makes everything in their life work and work well. Single moms also have a routine and it is pretty much the only thing that keeps them from going completely insane. To allow someone to potentially mess up that routine that keeps your life together screams DANGER. You definitely don’t want dating to be the reason you fed your kid dog chow and your dog a sloppy joe.
5. Too Much to Do!
Trying to keep your little ones alive while also trying to finish errands is a never-ending job. Diaper changing, playtime, soccer practice, making time to eat real food and not just the cheerios that your infant dropped on the floor. You tell your date, yes! You would love to go to that fancy restaurant French Laundry with him but all the while thinking ..umm can we just like.. actually do laundry while eating french fries on the floor??”
6. Do They Have Kids?
Not everyone is into kids, especially when they are not your own. Do you really feel like turning into the Brady Bunch? What if their kid makes Dennis the Menace look like an angel?
7. Do They Have Their Shit Together?
Before kids, you probably never cared if your date had a dead end job or a car insurance policy that barely passes for legal. But now….HI! You do!
The next guy needs to have his shit together because most likely, you barely have yours! If you struggle to keep all your ducks in a row, you definitely don’t need to add someone else’s random ducks!
That is just toooo many ducks!
8. Prove Yourself
The hardest part about dating as a single mom is needing more from a guy than usual. Can they speak intelligently and like Kermit the frog? Would they be willing to make fire roasted salmon and fish sticks for dinner? It is no longer about just your needs, but now your kiddos’ too. A guy needs to prove himself a bit harder for single moms but in the end, it is worth the reward.
<3 Hot Mess
Featured image by Samatha Black Photography