What comes to mind when you think of an Australian man…
Dreamy blue eyes? Bronze silky skin? Luscious blond hair? Perhaps the accent of an Angel?
Yes, I can confirm, Australian men are just as beautiful as they sound. In fact, they were one of five reasons I wanted to move to this country in the first place.
I used to think, “Wow, I bet dating an Australian guy would be just super duper cool, screw these American douchebags, I need a man from down under in my life”.
Ha, well it’s been 3 years now since I have lived in this mystical land of beautiful male creatures and I can honestly say things have not gone exactly according to plan. Though, yes, they are amazing guys like I anticipated, I completely underestimated how many hurdles I would have to jump through to actually try and successfully date one.
With a combination of both my personal experiences and those of the women around me…
These are the top struggles every girl faces when trying to date an Australian man:
1. Always Second
You might be the most perfect, loving, “make your man sandwiches every day with extra bacon” type gal, but there will always be someone they will put before you. They even go to see her the second they wake up in the morning and for some hardcore Aussies, even late in the night. Their hearts belong to those beautiful waves that give them the chance to be one with the ocean. I am sure they like you, I am sure you are tops. But the ocean comes first, then you… eh, or sports. It’s debatable.
2. Traveling Addicts
Aussie guys love to travel. And I mean LOOOOVE to travel. Which I have always found to be a very sexy trait. Traveling makes us more worldly and open-minded but when it comes to trying to date someone, it is utterly annoying!! Many Aussies travel for months at a time, and frankly, you are lucky if they even come back. Often when I try dating an Aussie, by the second date he will already be off in London, Mexico or Budapest. Doesn’t really matter where he’s at! All I know is by the time they come back… well, crap!
What was your name again?
3. Aussie Girls
Aussie girls. Seriously. It is disgusting how stunning they are. Oh, and on top of that, they are always literally in every direction you look. I will go out on Saturday night feeling like I’m looking pretty good just to walk into the bar and, seriooooousllyyyy?!!? Welp! Back home it is for some Netflix and Cheese. There is just no competing with all these babealicious girls running around this country. Well, unless you can catch a guy alone and drunk. Very drunk.
Too many times to count, have I showed up to meet my date and he is already three sheets to the wind! Alcohol is very social here, making it common for Aussie guys to go for drinks with coworkers after work oorrrrr, have a liquid lunch. So the odds of him being well oiled by the time you even know his name is just like his blood alcohol content, very high. I am all about having a few drinks on a date, but nothing is sexy about someone already barking at the moon before I arrive.
5. I’m Sexy and I Know It
I am pretty sure all this talk of their dreaminess is not at all going to their heads. How do I know? Because I know they already know!!!! Trust me they knowwww. And since they are aware, the lack of effort these guys put into dating or making a commitment is seriously pathetic. They know they do not even need to try, and that is the problem. Attempting to plan a night out or even just suggest where to meet is too much to ask. Have a door opened for you or have them get the bill?
HA, now we are talking crazy talk.
This was something that came as a surprise to me when I first started dating here. The majority of Aussie guys don’t drive cars?! No no. Instead, they ride a motorbike. Their precious, “I need to talk about it every five seconds,” motorbike. Dating a guy with a motorbike is hard because they are always off riding and harder to get a hold of. I once made reservations at a 5-star restaurant for him to show up in freaking jeans and boogers on his face!
Trying to meet up with an Aussie you are dating on a night that a match is on is a joke. Like most men anywhere, Aussie’s love their sports and going to a live event or watching it at the pub with mates often takes first priority. Who am I kidding, it ALWAYS takes first priority. Doesn’t matter if he says it is AFL, BBL, NRL, or AL, I think OMG, FML! They will cancel any plans they might have accidentally made on game night to ensure they are a part of the craziness. If you are lucky you will get a very becoming drunk call after to meet up.
8. Scarcity of Men
Not only is there a surplus of smoking hot ladies here, on top of that there is an extreme scarcity of single men. So what is the result of this economic dating crisis you ask? Guys will just go from one girl to the next one. It is safe to say Aussie guys are not too big on commitment. You can totally be his Thursday night, but just know he probably already has a Friday, Saturday and Sunday night as well.
Want to know why? Because they can!
Well, there you have it! Some interesting struggles we face trying to date Australian men.
Regardless of the struggles, I still love my Aussie Guys! <3
Have any additional struggles to add?
<3 Hot Mess